My coach said in response to my objection to blogging weekly that when you add love to being bogged down, you get blogging. She’s right. In fact, when you add love to anything it gets better. I’ve done it numerous times in different situations, and it works every time. For instance, when I’m doing a program and my energy wanes, usually in mid-afternoon, I look at the participants and think, I love these people. Every one of them. They begin to look different. My shift in thinking energizes me and fans the flame I want them to feel about the content. Whether we're talking about believing in you, being a better leader of yourself and others, or streamlining your use of email – no matter the content, audience or location - looking at them with love increases my energy and shifts the way I talk with them. And now look what it's done.....it's helped me write this entry. Thanks, coach! 
Monday, March 25, 2013
Bogged down blogging
My coach said in response to my objection to blogging weekly that when you add love to being bogged down, you get blogging. She’s right. In fact, when you add love to anything it gets better. I’ve done it numerous times in different situations, and it works every time. For instance, when I’m doing a program and my energy wanes, usually in mid-afternoon, I look at the participants and think, I love these people. Every one of them. They begin to look different. My shift in thinking energizes me and fans the flame I want them to feel about the content. Whether we're talking about believing in you, being a better leader of yourself and others, or streamlining your use of email – no matter the content, audience or location - looking at them with love increases my energy and shifts the way I talk with them. And now look what it's done.....it's helped me write this entry. Thanks, coach! 
Wednesday, March 20, 2013
Biking again
Jack and I rode our bikes about 5 miles Sunday afternoon. First time in about 20 years! Felt great. Loved it. I’m so grateful we could ride without hesitation or fear. It felt natural to be riding again. I blocked out thoughts of when I did a power slide onto gravel, wearing shorts, when I was a kid. Instead, I focused on how good it felt, the breeze, warmth, beautiful scenery. When I struggled going up a hill in Winter Park (yes, there are hills in flat Florida), I started counting my pedaling. When it got harder and I didn’t like how I was feeling, I started praying the Hail Mary in time with my pedaling and shifted my thinking to ‘I can do this.’ It worked! Just like when I get in a jam or frustrated, I talk to God or say a prayer and shift my thoughts to a more positive perspective. It makes such a difference. I’m so grateful for that.I took a 2 mile spin around the neighborhood this morning – I think I’m hooked.
Friday, March 15, 2013
Performing is short-lived
One of my mentees has been very candid about the way she feels about speaking to large groups. It gives her the hee bee gee bees. We talked about how doing it more will make it easier. Now she's pushing herself to speak to groups, even seeking opportunities. After a recent presentation, she realized that when she thinks about the audience and what will help them understand her message instead of thinking about herself and what she looks like, sounds like, she has a much more positive experience. Her audience is more responsive.
A lot has to do with how we view our situation. Are we performing or are we having an experience? Peter Bregman, my favorite Harvard Business Review blogger, writes:
"If you view life as a performance, your failures will be so painful and terrifying that you will stop experimenting. But if you view life as an experience, your failures are just part of that experience.
What makes a performance different than an experience? It's all in your head.
Are you trying to look good? Do you want to impress others or win something? Are you looking for acceptance, approval, accolades, wild thunderous applause? Is it painful when you don't get those things? You're probably performing.
If you're experiencing, on the other hand, you're exploring what something feels like. Trying to see what would happen if...
When you're experiencing, you can appreciate negative outcomes as well as positive ones. Sure, acceptance and approval and accolades feel good, but those things don't determine success. Success is based on whether you fully immerse yourself in the experience, no matter how it turns out, and whether you learn from it. That's a result you can always achieve regardless of the outcome.
When you're performing, your success is disturbingly short-lived. As soon as you've achieved one milestone or received a particular standing ovation, it's no longer relevant. Your unending question is: what's next?
When you're experiencing though, it's not about the end result, it's about the moment. You're not pursuing a feeling after, you're having a feeling during. You can't be manipulated by a fickle, outside measure because you're motivated by a stable internal one.
Read the article:
http://blogs.hbr.org/bregman/2013/01/stop-focusing-on-your-performa.html
A lot has to do with how we view our situation. Are we performing or are we having an experience? Peter Bregman, my favorite Harvard Business Review blogger, writes:
"If you view life as a performance, your failures will be so painful and terrifying that you will stop experimenting. But if you view life as an experience, your failures are just part of that experience.
What makes a performance different than an experience? It's all in your head.
Are you trying to look good? Do you want to impress others or win something? Are you looking for acceptance, approval, accolades, wild thunderous applause? Is it painful when you don't get those things? You're probably performing.
If you're experiencing, on the other hand, you're exploring what something feels like. Trying to see what would happen if...
When you're experiencing, you can appreciate negative outcomes as well as positive ones. Sure, acceptance and approval and accolades feel good, but those things don't determine success. Success is based on whether you fully immerse yourself in the experience, no matter how it turns out, and whether you learn from it. That's a result you can always achieve regardless of the outcome.
When you're performing, your success is disturbingly short-lived. As soon as you've achieved one milestone or received a particular standing ovation, it's no longer relevant. Your unending question is: what's next?
When you're experiencing though, it's not about the end result, it's about the moment. You're not pursuing a feeling after, you're having a feeling during. You can't be manipulated by a fickle, outside measure because you're motivated by a stable internal one.
Read the article:
http://blogs.hbr.org/bregman/2013/01/stop-focusing-on-your-performa.html
My New Favorite Thing
I love my new clothes drier! Now when I have sweaters that have to "lay flat to dry," they have an airy, stable, stainless steel collapsible drying rack to rest on in the backyard. Yesterday I used it to air out pillows in the sunshine. From www.organizeit.com
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